> bring me to life.

~~Wednesday, October 31, 2007~~

11:42 PM

my last day at the bloody place....lol

had severe headaches...feeling slightly warm when i left hm to work today...

even though i alrdy completed the LPs for this week...hahaha...bt i didn't submit at all, didn't make up the theme boards...the worst thing is i dismantled all the things that i used to decorate...packed and bring home!! wa...imagine the class so emptied....

had my last Maths lesson with my kiddos...they like duno im nt ..nv ...cmg bk to teach them anymore...they thought i wld jus be away for a few days and cm bk...haiz...kids....
then naptime i took half an hr nap together with them...argh...the headaches is killing
once got out of the mattress...its like thousand or billion tonnes on the head...so giddy!!! and heavy....

after teabreak brought them out to playgrd...sat at the kiddy rider and chat with Tr Pris...so sick man...

went bk to the class, feeling so cold sia...im really SICK! packed my stuffs and i bid my kiddos goodbye and the UGLY supervisor took over my class...i thought i was so brave nv teared...
lol....

BUT as i walked passed Tr Pris's class..when i saw her bade my goodbye..both my hands covered my eyes and i started "raining"..."Oei...dun like tat" she cried to me...cos i made her teared too... then i cried uncontrollably tat none of them cld hear me talking...lol

then Ji lao shi came and hugged me, Tr Pris's kiddos came one by one hugged and kissed me...i said..."see my class, none of them are so lovely as u ppl...kiddos nt fr my classes came hugging me to bless me..."
u can nv imagine wat my class kiddos said .... they said "so big alrdy still cry..." GOODNESS!!!

heheh probably u nv see me cried...i looked the ugliest the worst when i cry...my whole face red, my eyes damn swollen so is my nose....

Ji lao Shi's class gave me a very formal farewell greetings " Zai jian Teacher Serene! Wo men yong yuan ai ni! xie xie Teacher Serene!"

i cried more...Tr Pris said"u shd go out of this place happily ma...cry for wat...worst u make me cry together.."

all the words tat can cm out was " wo she bu de ni men he xiao peng you ma...nt the LAIs...." then we hugged again...

hahaha...imagine...i had to stay for awhile to cool myself then i took cab home...in the cab still tearing....and the stupid cabby still can tok cork with me...BTH!!!

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Tuesday, October 30, 2007~~

11:39 PM

MOM replied.... that they are in view that its at employer's discretion but they should excerise flexiblity on genuine cases... means MLC shd nt forced me to pay them bk DOUBLES!!!

but sianz alrdy i tell u... i couldn't be bothered to chase them bk the $$

i dun even wanna be in touch with them any more...cos if i do im gg to make sure their reputation are tarnished!

i mean what i said! MLC u jus watch out! kekekeke

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Monday, October 29, 2007~~

8:04 PM

MY LITTLE CAMPUS (SEMBAWANG)

SUCKS...pui cao nua...

ALL THE BEST TO THOSE STAYING BEHIND...

**************************************************************************************
waiting patiently for JUSTICE to befall.
God Bless

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Sunday, October 28, 2007~~

5:05 AM

yipee....3 more working days with MLC and off i go!!!
No more LPs, no more Theme board hassles....

currently in a craze for playing sudoku....lol
Ji lao shi saw me playing during one of the breaktimes on thurs...went to zap a few puzzles to solve...then the very next day she sneaked out to popular bkstore to purchase one herself.

Tr Pris said "ni hai school waste resources" lol cos lao shi went to zap, make cover page and bind them! imagine...aiyo..she split the book into part1 and 2 so tat its nt too thick...goodness....

bt of cos we hv lots of fun competing with each other for speed! hehee

hey its stress relieving for me...i duno abt lao shi...haha cos she jus fell out of love...so thank me for saving her fr the pool of tears she was in the day b4 i brought sudoku into her life! (hao lian..kekeke)

***********
then u were there
out u go
and bk u appear
now u disappear once again

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Saturday, October 27, 2007~~

2:27 AM

this is my 1st time uploading the videoclip
hopefully it turns out ok....

dun wanna back date this video... heheh

Happy 4th Birthday Bryan darling

Look at Bryan closely he seems shy...
Look at Chloe the chubby girl standing near Bryan...she blew his candles!!
then catch his mischief towards the end

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Thursday, October 25, 2007~~

1:00 PM

hey kimmie! this post is for you! =)

sorry i fell aslp with my boys last nite, now woke up then upload these pics...(nt too clear oso...hope u can see the rose! =p)

i used bryan's wrist as a guide hope it suits ur kiddos! hehe

let me knw if its ok via sms then i make the rest during my break time. pls leta me knw if you wanna make 2 for each kid instead of one OR make one in creamy white and the other one in gold...so means each kid has one kind of rose on each wrist OR boys use diff colour rose fr the girls.... hehehe...so excited for u...

ALL THE BEST FOR UR CONCERT!

(sorrys the pics abit blur....hope u still can see the rose! hahaha)

this is how it looks after fastening ... u can use the tails i left to tie on the kiddos' wrists

hope u can see the twists and folds of the rose..... hehehe

side view of the rose on bryan's wrist

top view of the rose on bryan's wrists...

Pls sms me once u read this posting!!! do give me ur comments and suggestions ok?

cheers

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Tuesday, October 23, 2007~~

11:51 PM

ok finali the Lais look me up to "discuss" abt my resignation

he tried making me stay...said lots of things---> nice things hahaha wic i believe are all made up cos they need me to stay to cover their shortage of teachers...
- i received several compliments abt u and ur teachings from parents (nv hear b4)
- understd fr Tr Khim, u r good (ya i AM good to my kiddos, jus stern and firm on things other than play)
- i can increase ur pay bt the most abt $500.. (kaoz...)
blah blah blah blah blah....

think he got tired after a few tries to ask me stay, beating ard bushes....he sure hasgt very good PR skills....

then he asked"dun mind tell me hw much they are paying u"
i replied "then i hope u dun mind hearing..." (very xiao zhang i knw, bt thats the way to deter him fr saying he can increase my pay further...)

in the end he gave up..."i think no choice, i've to let u go. All the best. who knows we will meet and work together again." --->Eeeyew...i hope nt...hahahaha

so utimately gota compensate 2weeks of $$$ to him for giving 2weeks notice...

then my supervisor supposed to take over my class .ie take bk her own class...she gota teach, do lps, PTM, mini concert....she damn nt happy with me...
giving me one kind of look...then keep saying she receive lots of parents calling in to complain abt my teachings (then hw cm i nv hear even once when i receive the children or sent them hm?), then say my teaching method doesnt suit the kiddos...their behaviours changed...and stuffs (bt frankly speaking, their changed of behaviour is good thingy to me...at least they learn to respect teachers and nt pull hair and grab legs and scream or call teachers nicknames...wic i feel nt wat kiddos shd do...then most of their concepts they did better now...even the worst kiddos are trying hard to prove me they can do by themselves without COPYING wic they hv been doing all the while!!!imagine!!! after i changed their seats, they cant copy so they did their works slow, bt i dun mind! at least they try and did the work by themselves ! wic i got proud of myself! and glad i made a difference in them b4 i go...)

watever she wanna say la...she can forget abt making me demoralised....im tougher than she thought...im jus upset she did this to me...nv shw any appreciation for me
SO all the more i shd jus GO and chiong for my new direction!

*************************************************************************************
heartfelt thanks to kim.
thanks for being there,
thanks for hearing me nag, grumble, curse and swear....haha...Ooops...
thanks for comforting me..
thanks for giving me faith...
thanks for teaching me to have faith in ME
thanks for being U
u r a blessed teacher!!!

I couldnt THANK JESUS for more...i jus hv to work hard to repay Him for his favors and graces..means nt letting anyone esp Him down la...hahhaa

i have faith in You..in ME...in ALL...

hiphiphurrays for me!!!!! =)

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Monday, October 22, 2007~~

3:24 AM

did i ever mention that all my dreams are damn super zhun? means true...it will happen someday jus duno when.......

had a very very very very very very very bad nightmare

i was awaken by my own tears...and still crying so hard after i opened my eyes sitting up on my bed...

i hope it's jus a dream...

i hope it nv turns out to be true/reality...

im crossing my fingers, praying hard...

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Friday, October 19, 2007~~

3:03 AM

finali tendered ... ...
hopefully dun hv to compensate
startg new life as project manager on 1st Nov IF all goes well... ...

tok to papa abt this change of career direction... he gave a vr gd advice... "gd is gd la...e'tink is excellent.. the pay, the benefits, the welfare... BUT the responsibility is greater.u r accountable to most things."

then i told him" at least i gave it a try... if reali tak buleh then i can always go bk to teachg... er bu si...lol" and papa agreed and ask me faster take license. =)

May Good Lord Bless me, all of us.... AMEN

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Tuesday, October 16, 2007~~

3:59 AM

i jus finished my stupid lps for this week...late again cos i always KO when my eyes are at this com...haha...can die...

tat explains my panda-ric eyes lor...

haiz...i grow fatter liao...eat, sit, teach, eat, sit, teach....at times bring kiddos outdoor, tried running and playing like mad with them to burn the excess calories..but doesnt seem to help...argh...sianz...

was approached by ah nam in the late afternoon. wanna engage me as his project manager.sounds pro la...but its a coordinating job, gta run ard sites...his offer is good...on top of that he providing me car after i get my license...

i wanna switch back cos pay higher means pocket loose abit ...good for us...and i dun hv to worie cos of the Expensive milk ben ben needa supplement when im at work...

hmm...but im vr contridicting la...i alrdy knw my kiddos so well...as in i can control them in my class...and they begin to apprecaite me for who i am...its kinda bad rite? leave them suddenly...

told kimmie abt this, told Tr Pris abt this, told cow abt this...told Zi abt this...all supportive, except cow...wet blanket...said then y i resign from TC which offers gd pay and bonuses...then go study this say wanna be lecturer someday and earn higher income...then nw wanna work for ah nam...so saddening...told him cos now got ben ben more expenses mah, if wanna be lecturer still gota wait for almost 2 yrs aft i complete the degree course..the time is longer lor..and tat time resign cos of interests, for bryan, and ben ben wasn't there yet mah...so still financially OK...now gota tink of $$$ for the kids, allowance for in laws who take care of benben...if gt extras...for my parents (till nw still cnt fork out the $ for them - so sorry, and thks papa mama for understanding)

tink i gota compensate the company for early termination cos im supposed to serve 1 mth notice...bt i duno hw much yet. tmr go ask them...tmr ask ah nam for more details abt the salary, working hrs and stuffs...

then again i wanna thank kimmie...love u deep deep.thanks for the prayers..thanks for everything...when i dwn so deep dwn.. ur always there to pick me up and back again..its really hounorable and a great pleasure having u as a sista...muacks..words are nt enuff to express my heartfelt thanks... and my Xiao Wan Zi aka xiaoball..lol..the new nick suits u..thanks for ur listening ears...duno ur ears kena "infection" or nt hear so many "dirty" things fr me..kakakaka..u knw wat im toking abt la..thks!

its ahopeful day ahead...and i cnt slp i duno y..tat explains hw excited i am rite now...

its a back dated pic taken on children's day...

bryan is such a sweetie...

"mummie i want carry ah ben"

"hehehe...mummie i love ben..."

so my sis in law helped me took pictures of them together...

see bryan's smile so wide! lol he loves to carry ah ben...

but ben ben got attitude problem with bryan...lol ...

whenever bryan tries to cover his vision - so that ben can only see bryan only, ben ben will turn his head to avoid seeing bryan! omg! so young like tat liao...older le how sia!

ben ben will raise his voice at bryan oso...but as usual bryan is soso happy cos to him ah ben is responding to him aka playing and talking to him la! hahaha....ocassionaly ben oso smile widely at bryan la...

the 2 bros...vr funie !

i love both of them to bits.....

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Sunday, October 14, 2007~~

11:39 PM

finished my teachg materials for maths early this morning...supposed to do my LPs now...
on pc, stared and stared at the monitor...
browsed through friendster, xiaowanzi's blog, kpokpo look at her frends' blogs...
then here i m posting...

ARGH.....
sianology filled me for like so many hours? or days?
its killing all my brain cells...
hairs falling like nobody's biz...i can go bald sia!!!!

haiz...sian sian sian sian and more sianzzzzz...
tmr class photo taking gota dressed up, put on makeups...wth...i always wear vr "log kok" to work...cos deal with so many little kiddos...there's no nid to dress so formally.. need to get rough and play with them... =) arh...tok abt them...i kinda wish they were all my own kiddos! lol...

anyway...sent ah ben ben to shave his head this afternoon at the barber shop nr dad's place...he's like a little monk now...so cutie!
then was like bz buying stuffs for bryan's bdae goodie bags...ordered an Elmo cake for him instead of mickey mouse...
and now i jus remembered...i forgot to buy disposable forks and plates and the napkins...haiz..guess age is really catching up...

as i typed, my eyelids got heavier...lol do i look like garfield now?
lol watever, i jus dun hv the mood to do LPs...
tmr lunch break and naptime then try to finish lor...hehhee

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Saturday, October 13, 2007~~

11:58 PM

oh my oh my...
ben ben has constipated for 4 days...or 5?
brought him to consult a specialist ...
after she insert a gel like medicine in his anus...he let out a loud fart and passed motion finally while we were making payment at the counter...

she said ben's highly sensitive to the formula(Friso 1) im mixing for him...
gota change to Nan-1 ; Nan-1 HA or mix the existing with Friso Comfort (she said this is the most difficult to source milk- really i searched alot of places nv carry this brand)
so bought Nan-1 HA for him to try la... arh..so expensive the formula...

argh...trying hard to UP my B/milk...
trying oatmeal, medication, eat more fish...drink more milk...
basically it tink cos nv rest enuff so supply low...
the doc advised me to let ben drink more b/milk if possible...
im like kinda stressed out...

praying praying...
watever i alrdy did my best...
leave to God... =) [dun say im lazy..cos everything seems to leave to God. im His creation, He knows whats best for me =) ]

**********
this song lyrics keeps coming to my mind, bt i jus cnt recall wat song is tat...it goes like this...
"....u left me, jus when i needed u most..."

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Wednesday, October 10, 2007~~

1:33 AM

ok tot of back log some of my postings...
then as usual blogger loves JAMMING!
time wasting to load the pics and type and finally all cant publish! bravo!

haiz...feeling lousy right now...
i duno wat to say
cos i said something really wrong and got u soso upset abt the whole thingy when my main concern is for u to be happy w/o worrying for us...and the whole idea was so damn wrong as put fwd to u...

mayb thats wat the saying goes "suo zhe wu yi, ting zhe you yi"
anyway...deep down i knw this is the best the best for u and all... =)

one day, some day, you will realise this is my way of loving u...
loving u doesnt mean owning u
its the heart tat counts
its the feelings that counts
its the thoughts that counts...

watever...but u r counting wat my love is right now - it hurts when turns so so "calculative"

still i wanna say "I'm VERY SORRY"

im gona leave it to God once more..Have Faith! Amen..

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Monday, October 01, 2007~~

10:47 PM

HAPPY CHILDREN'S DAY!!!

at the playground

Nursery A and B combined