> bring me to life.

~~Friday, April 27, 2007~~

10:00 AM

now then i realised...we didnt have any proper photo tat i can post sia...
saddening...

ur smile is ever so captivating...and it is still... tats y... lol

ur smile makes my day
ur care and concern give me strength
ur love is the daily dosage of vitamins in my life
ur hugs confirms our special relationship

I Love U my dear, my boy and boy... hahaha...Zeus come in my life FAST... really can't wait liao... hehee
I Love U all my sistas and my peeps - Kim, Ernie...and the list goes on...

*************************************************************************************

having real backaches these days... if i get up fr my seat, i cant walk upright striaght away...the pain is killing...so im like crouching?
last nite had sharp pain at the abdominal... hope Zeus is doing ok inside... ... haiz... Zeus dun let off gas in me can? mayb tats y im having the so-called stomachache la... Naughty boy...

Bryan has been throwing bad tantrams these few days... screaming out of a sudden for no apparent reasons... aiyo its torturing... ...

ydae he went for a Botanic Garden excursion. i cnt follow cos the supervisor scared anything happen to me..so i was out la...saddening... rot at home...anyway ydae rain damn heavy and was like for the whole day? so the trip wasnt really tat great cos alot of games cannot be carried out...hahaha...maybe becos im nt there...so the weather BAD...kekekke

Bryan so happy sia, sit in a PINK bus (his fav colour)... played paper aeroplanes and ball games and the best part was Liu lao shi said he ate 6 pcs of nuggets and still asking for more...my goodness..he must be damn hungry after the long walk in the garden and the games.... BIG EATER in the school...all the children only eat 4 or less nia and somemore he ate a big apple! aiyoyo....

i post his pics in the friendster later when i free... ...lol

ok ciao

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Tuesday, April 24, 2007~~

9:20 AM

haiz..fucking idiot ydae...PUI!!! knn
sorie for all the swearing... jus damn pissed with somebody
dun continue to read if u r nt feeling well or cant tahan swearing...there will be tonnes of swearing herein...

wat u mean by "wat kind of big sister are u? try to sour my relationship with family?"
knn... im jus having minor discussion among sisters-our lvl, watz wrong?
it hasnt reached papa mama and ur damn fucking husband...wat sour ur relationship with them?
gulit is pricking u rite?

anyway it u who tarnish ur own credibility in our family...tell me since when u ever honour ur own words?
when u r in need, we are always there for u..u jus dun wanna acknowledge tat fact...
and this is the kind of treatment we - i mean i get from u B****!

if im nt pregnant, im working and having income, i wnt have asked u to rtn me the amt u owed. tats my hard earned $$ mind u... now tat coming to a yr with no income, im jus asking bk wat i loan u, am i in the wrong?

and fucking fact that lies upon heaps of lies... and wat u mean by " i pretend to be OK with u, but tok behind ur back?"
fuck off ok...all along, my sms to u werent really ok, if im doing ok, i wnt have asked u to rtn me the $$.and im pissed off by all ur pack of lies...arent u tired of telling lies? and yes, i did hide fr papa and mama abt my resignation and taking up the ECE course, BUT i never once did take $$ fr anyone...i even go to the extend to cash in all my coins savings jus to make ends meet...
u have a family to support with ur husband, me too...
u are staying off with ur inlaws so less expenses..ur gal still young wat... only expenses is on the stupid car.
im staying on our own, we got more bills and expenses to commit...and rite now there's only one breadwinner here...my boy schooling and stuffs...
and we have cut back by not giving mthly allowances to both family parents...

if u have spoken to us of the truth from beginning, none of these wld have happened...
u tink i wld believe that cpf board deduct all ur salary one shot to papa's account?
and on the other hand u r telling lianye, u r returning $$ to papa's cpf?
whenever cpf wanna deduct any amt fr ur acc, they wld send letter of statement to inform u 1st..
dun take me for granted... i can be very nice to u and can be otherwise.
cant rtn me jus speak the truth, dun lie and lie again...tats wat pissed me off...
and i cnt be bothered watz the conversation between u and lianye tat makes u say i trying to sour family relationship...

and ya i can be tat damn big meanie by putting up here in the blog ur sms to me...but forget it la...u r alrdy so thick-skinned enuff to lie... wat more to put them up to shame u...
lol...
ya treat it as a gift to u for me to knw ur underlying colour...

*************************************************************************************

ydae made some memory training game cards for Bryan.
numbers and number words - i call it the gingerbread man cards
ABC big and small letters - tat i havent named

last nite played with bryan after gt hm fr in law hse, he likes it alot. actually he likes the gingerbread man la..lol
im trying to get him to recognise the words and match the numbers 1st, once he master it, i will teach him to play snatch! hahha its like playing heart attack when u get the same card or matching cards u snapped and grab the cards, the person with most cards wins..

tonite playing the ABC cards with him...likewise once he master shall play snatch

today, i tot of making a small scale snake and ladder board game - either in numbers or ABC..havent decide yet..shall do after i blog here..hehehe
kids still learn best thru play... gt childhood la at least..not study and study and study nia rite?

think tats wat i can do during this period of time, and at the same time can try to source for more teaching materials, when i get to work in sept after my delivery hopefully, they will come in handy...hehe

ok lah...i have bitched alot alrdy...at least i feel so much better after blogging it...

The kind of plant u will get
depends on the kind of seed u put in.
The correct amount of nutrients will also affect its growth.
too much or too little will damage it.
U reap what u sow
thats the meaning.

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Tuesday, April 17, 2007~~

11:28 PM

what does LOVE really comprises of?
mutual trust;
loyalty;
faithfulness;
care & concern;
understanding;
commitment;
sharing;
communication;
quality time spent together;
just being together;
laughters;
cries;
sorrows;
Ups & Downs;
happiness;
****** ? what is lacking?
is hatre supposed to be part of LOVE as well....? its tiring...

*************************************************************************************
hope u were still here with me... ...
at least there's a listening ear... ...
and maybe a comforting shoulder to lean on... ...
hahahahahahaha... (im laughing.... i will be ok)
*************************************************************************************

Zeus, funie mummy gt a feeling u might cm out as a gal!
haha...im thinking too much and u r kicking, positioning too much...
Bryan gor gor cant wait to sing songs to u face to face...
he said u can slp together with him... ...
great rite...
cant wait to have u with us
LOves mummy & gorgor

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Saturday, April 14, 2007~~

4:55 PM

Monday ended with so much sadness... ... its heartbreaking and... ... a torture?

coldness set in till thursday?

thinking it wld get better... ...

again friday was a nightmare... ...

tears are inevitable? heart torn apart into million ...zillion pieces?

doubt it can ever be mended in anyway... ...

trust... no trust hw to be together... ...

liers... i hate most... ...

if im to deliver now or died in an accident, calls were made but u cldnt be bothered to pick.... GOOD... let me go, give back my freedom...

wat do u mean by " y find me so urgent?"

1 and half hrs trying to reach u ... oni to find out its a lie...

havent been feeling well... in the heart...

cldnt breathe properly either... its a struggle... ...

if this commitment is too tough for u...

lets separate...

i can support me and my 2 gems...

silence is the best antidote at the moment i guess...

LIFE is such... CHoices are to be made... Journey to carry on...

*************************************************************************************

Zeus, im hoping u can cm to this world earlier...

im really tired

i still gt things to prepare to buy b4 u cm here...

wanna see u soon...

Love u mummy.... =)

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Sunday, April 08, 2007~~

11:41 PM

haiz...havent been blogging..lol

bz mah...reading books...lol...slping...cos havent been able to slp well at nite...

Zeus kicking...must be as excited as me while i read the books....gan cheong mah...wat to do...

haiz..jus dun understd MEN...

MEN really from MARS meh? WOMEN from VENUS? zhun bor???

men tot we women always ask for $$$

pls lah... at least im nt that kind of person...

dun stuff $$ to me and expect that i can do wonders on it...

i need accompanian...someone to tok to, to share things with, to buy and shop ard for stuffs... and of cos carry them la...

sian sia...

was at cold war wif COW...cos he always Mahjong NUmber 1...

me and bryan and Zeus...last to be on his mind...BLOODY idiot...

kip asking me wat happen...y i dun tok...ANGRY la silly then u think its fun har...

fling the 2 blue notes at me...vr BIG issit...

i cnt be bothered...

i jus wanna get out of the hse and shop or at least walk ard and have a proper meal outside with u...machiam so difficult like tat...

NO JOB...coop at hm damn sian can u jus put urself in my shoes?

doing hseworks... reading...watching tv...slping issnt so great as i cant stay at hm DO NOTHING...and these mandane stuffs are killing me...

anyway...i nagged enuff...

the war is still on...

dun expect me to tok hor...

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Wednesday, April 04, 2007~~

8:39 AM

3rd Apr
supposed to have routine chkup at NUH,but went to redhill to meet ex-collegues racheal, wong, colin, lay hong (pity jen, clemence, avon, joey and kit cldnt join us cos kena stuck in the rain) for lunch b4 heading there.

had so much fun lunchie wif them...missed the old times...laughters nv ends...hahaha xD
supposed to be at HAN's but cos the rest cldnt make up their minds so we went to Mac instead...hahaha...funie lah

though its oni an hr affair, i cherish the moment! cos still early so i went up to the office to meet joey who gt bk fr site visit..lol...gers are gers lah..meet liao gt many things to chit chat abt ...ayio then i was late for my appt lor...lol

the clinic gt super damn many patients today...waited for an hr plus for my turn, and another say hr an hr more to make payment...its really a torture!!! argh.... anyway im gg hv my last full scan again nxt mth, the day after my BDAE! lol
cos i gt natin to do...so i went Bt MErah library using Cow's IC to borrow books...kekeke...there gt much more variety than Jurong branch ...hehe...borrowed 3 books..but one of them when i begin to read into it ..the 1st chapter i alrdy cannot follow...the style the author used...vr confusing...lol so in fact i oni gt 2 books to cover b4 i meet XiaoBall to Jurong library on thurs and hv fun...hehehe

while browsing the books in the libraru had a call fr the Children' CAmpus Mr Quek...aiyo actually he wanted an immediate teacher to work...but since i was due in july..he said he will take down my particulars and something abt myself and he will call me sometime in sept in he still got vacany then..ok la...means till now i gt 2 pending ones...gota lookout for the ctrs in my neighbourhood la...can save tpt fees...meals alrdy covered..hahaha
but i gt the urge to try the Mr Quek's ctr cos its a franchise of Pat's Schoolhouse...which is quite a good school for pre-schoolers i heard...hehehe

anyway..tats all...i still gta wait till sept lor...Thank God for giving me hope to move on...CHEERFULLY...lol

*************************************************************************************

4th Apr
actually today supposed to meet XiaoBall to library, bt cos Cow taken AL, so we are gg out dating la..hence gt to scarfice her..heheh...sorie babe...i see u tmr hor...

the weather nowadays is so unpredicatable..either extremely hot..u can sweat even u jus take a 2 step walk...haiyoyo...or...machiam damn hazy...thick fog and then it pours so heavily, cnt even see watz outside of my window at all...ya its tat bad...haiz... but seems like its on alternative shift...meaning one day extreme hot , the next heavy downpour...the weather oso gt MOOD SWING hor...lol...

ok la...after send bryan to school, im here crapping nonsense in my blog...kekeke...
hopefully today's dating is fun and long (hopefully he wakes up early, if nt its gonna be a short date again...sian...lol )

Quote:
Don't let today's disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow's dreams.
Learn to dream, One day you will achieve it!!

jus wanna add on...
hey i rather u nv msg me...
watz a "u ok?" make any difference?
do u knw hw hard it is to get the incident to the back of my head?
y u always ... like... wanna see me hurt time and again?
FINE is my answer to u... and no more...
put a stop to it b4 i really #$@^*...
OK? if ur reading...

save me from the nothing I’ve become..

~~Monday, April 02, 2007~~

8:50 AM

aiyo so fast Apr liao!
new mth new hope!!

hahaha..i wanna thank God, cos Sharon Leong fr ICEC called to inform me that she has recommended me to a Pat's SchoolHouse Franchise childcare ctr at bt panjang, asking if im interested...of cos!!! somemore its nearer my house! thanks sharon! appreciated it alot! whether i get the job or not, its ok, cos i know now being pregnant, no employer wld take the risk, neither wld they wanna spend the extras on maternity leaves on me!
anyway, i've alrdy called the ctr, still waiting for the mr quek to call me bk.. =)

What is meant for me will be for me,
What's not, better don't ask for it!

hahaha...i jus started to post some pics..but i've no idea how to make the other pics come below this blog entry...hahaha...anyway...wait till i learnt then u all shall see more new pics upcoming..

okie..gtg..do laundry...then ltr meet my lil' sis to library! if gt time we go IMM eat!!!kekekekeke

see hw...

ciao

save me from the nothing I’ve become..